All of Newt Gingrich's top campaign workers have fled his presidential campaign
YOU’RE A HAS-BEEN, NEWT GINGRICH
Parody lyrics by Lynn Rockets
(sung to the Dr. Seuss song “The Grinch That Stole Christmas”)
You’re a has-been, Newt Gingrich
You’re lacking in appeal
Your were ousted as The Speaker
No one wants to hear you squeal
Newt Gingrich
You’re a unicycle
Without even one wheel
You’ve had three wives, Newt Gingrich
A mistress in the hole
Philandering’s your day job
You’re a slimy ugly troll
Newt Gingich
These woman that like you, must
Be on work release or parole
You’re a vile one, Newt Gingrich
Your words reek with rancid bile
Your criticism of Bill Clinton
As you’re cheating all the while
Newt Gingrich
There couldn’t be a bigger hypocrite
Within a Midwest country mile
You’re a foul one, Newt Gingrich
Your first divorce smelled of skunk
Your wife, Jackie fighting cancer
You told her she was junk
Newt Gingrich
The nicest words to describe you,
Are, as follows, and I quote, Pink. Wank, Punk
You’re a coward, Newt Gingrich
Avoided your army spot
Deferment-seeking chicken-hawk
That likes to talk real tough
Newt Gingrich
Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing
With the most disgraceful assortment of Republican
Sound-bytes imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots
You’re the racist, Newt Gingrich
It’s not Judge Sotomayor
You play the race card as a white guy
That’s so laughable I’m sure
Newt Gingrich
You’re a stinking pile of vomit
Sitting in the sun
With feces on top
